At the recent Women’s Wellbeing Conference in London Lila Turner pointed out that the idea of self-esteem doesn’t exist when we’re in a peaceful state of mind. When we’re in the zone, at peace, simply being-doing rather than trying-doing there is no sense of lack, and we are what we are without thought, without the need to make decisions or figure stuff out.
I’ve seen something similar and have shared with people that we’re naturally what we need to be (confident, clear, helpful) when we’re not lost in thought. When we see that the potential to be anything in any moment is a constant resource, there’s no desire to ‘get’ something (it doesn’t even make sense).
But something else occurred to me as Lila spoke; and that is this. If self-esteem doesn’t exist when we’re in a peaceful state, what does?
And I realised that nothing exists other than this. This moment. And everything is in this moment. It’s what is. ‘Things’ only exist when we mistake thought for something else and we temporarily forget that what we are is beyond any single thought.
Lila’s right, self esteem isn’t something you can get and loose. In the same way there is nothing you can get and loose. That’s the illusion. That there is something else. Rather than seeing the perfection of this.
“You see, there are two realities. One is the reality you now live in and the other lies deep within.” Sydney Banks*
I frequently get lost in the reality I live in – but when I catch a glimpse of the reality that lies deep within I remember that nothing else matters. That we already are what we seek.
We are not separate from the natural unfolding – it just appears that we’re out of sync with life when our minds are mistaking thought for something real. And we temporarily lose sight of this. The richness of this moment. The depth of feeling available, the connection with humanity, love, compassion. Understanding.
I was sitting with my Mum earlier today. She has alzheimers and often doesn’t know who I am. She looked at me and said “Nothing is true other than God; and that’s all you need to know”.
For me, God is This. This. Nothing separate.
So as we sink into the unknown and see the pattern is already perfect and will continue to unfold with or without your interference, we gently start to live as one, in peace and grateful for every so called coincidence, serendipitous moment and human connection.
“Then the already known appears. You will then see more of what-is and what-isn’t begins to fade away. Truth being the victor.” Sydney Banks*
*Both quotes from Beyond Beliefs: The Lost Teachings of Sydney Banks by Linda Quiring.
If you would like to learn more about The Women’s Well-being Conference, there is a Women’s Wellbeing Club launch on 8th March.